Thankful..Blessed!!

 Yesterday, Mathew Uncle did what he always seems to do best arrive in a flash and leave even faster. He dropped by for what can only be described as a lightning-fast visit, carrying some amazingly fresh fish. It was already cut and nearly cleaned, and within five minutes I had it washed, marinated, and ready. We tried convincing him to stay awhile, but he wasn't having any of it. Before we knew it, he was gone, leaving behind a bag of fish and a heart full of gratitude.

As I stood in the kitchen, I realised it wasn't really the fish that touched me.

It was the love behind it.

I was telling Achachan that there is something so special about that generation. They may not always express affection in words, but they have a beautiful way of showing it through actions. They take the time to cook, to prepare, to choose something they know you will enjoy, and then quietly bring it to you without expecting anything in return.

Every time someone drops off food, my mind goes back to Johnson Uncle and Auntie. They used to do exactly the same. Looking back, I realise that what they were really giving us was not food it was care, thoughtfulness, and the reassurance that we were remembered.

There is something deeply comforting about being remembered.

In a world where everyone is busy and rushing through life, these simple acts speak volumes. A parcel of fish, a container of curry, a homemade snack these things carry a message far greater than the food itself. What touched me most yesterday was the reminder of how God works through people.

Sometimes we do things quietly. We help where we can, pray for others, encourage someone, or simply try to be faithful in the little things. We do not do it for recognition, and often nobody even knows. Yet God has a way of returning love through unexpected channels. He uses people and ordinary moments to remind us that we are seen, cared for, and loved.

Yesterday felt like one of those moments.

The fish was wonderful, but the love behind it meant even more.

And once again, I was reminded that God often sends His kindness wrapped in the simplest of packages. ❤️

Unspoken ..unshared emotions

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

An Unchanging God....in a changing world

There are seasons in life when everything seems to happen at once. challenges begin to pile up, work situation feels heavier, seem to look complicated, and personal struggles seem to arrive without invitation. At the same time, sickness creeps in, draining energy and making one wonder.....

There have been moments when I have wondered why things are happening at the same time. Moments when I felt discouraged, exhausted, and even attacked. Yet, in the middle of it all, I am reminded of an important truth:

1. God is above every situation.
2. He is above the pressures.
3. He is above the uncertainty.
4. He is above the sickness.
5. He is above the fears that try to take hold of our minds.

The circumstances around us may change daily, but God's faithfulness does not. What feels overwhelming to us is never overwhelming to Him. The challenges we face today are not greater than the One who walks with us through them.

May be God will not immediately remove the storm. Instead, He gives us the strength to stand in it. It may look to us that we are failing and falling. I've held my tears from falling especially when at work, my eyes were brimming with tears but I've only got a God....who reminds me that my peace is not found in perfect circumstances but in His presence.

I felt weary, I choose to trust...but there were moments I slipped.Even when answers are delayed, I have to believe.

This season will pass.

The challenges will not last forever.

And through it all, God is still working, still guiding, and still holding every detail in His hands.

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." 

Today, I may not understand everything that is happening around me, but I know this: God is greater than every battle I face, and His plans for my life are bigger than the challenges standing before me.

My identity, My refuge, My shelter

It Felt Like a Storm

I was dealing with a health issue that left me frightened and exhausted. I was in pain, worried about what was happening to my body, and rushing to the clinic because I genuinely felt unwell.

While trying to navigate that, I missed an important work meeting. What followed felt like a chain reaction. And when I returned to work, recovering and trying to regain my footing, I was met with unexpected changes...and reactions

Of course, I am just a hireling. I cannot react to every decision that is made around me. I can only continue to do my work faithfully and say, "Thank You, Lord, for all that You are doing, even when I do not understand it."

To be honest, it felt as though everything was happening against me. I tried to see things from their perspective. I understood their reasons behind the decisions. I chose understanding over resentment. Yet deep inside, I was hurting.

• I could not share it with my spouse because I did not want to burden him further. Had it been a few years back, I am sure, I would have told him knowing what his decision would be, 
• I could not share it with a co-worker either.

So I carried it quietly. Every morning, and evening on my drive to work and back home, I cried till my throat hurt. My car became the one place where I could break down, release my emotions, pray, vent, and gather the strength to walk into another day.But somewhere in those difficult days, God began to teach me something.

• Circumstances may shift.
• People may make decisions.
• Situations may change overnight.
• But God remains unchanged.

And I realised something else: my family is far more important than any position, title, office, or workplace recognition.

• Jobs come and go.
• People come and go.
• Seasons come and go.
• But the people waiting for me at home are a gift from God that I must never take for granted.

My security must not be found in a job.
My peace must not be found in people's opinions.
My worth must not be measured by how included, valued, or recognised I feel in a particular season.
My future will not be determined by a difficult week.

God sees what others do not see.

He knows the battles we fight silently, the tears we cry privately, and the fears we hide behind our smiles.

He sees the employee who keeps showing up....

• The mother who keeps caring.
• The wife who keeps loving.
• The believer who keeps trusting even when nothing makes sense.
• What looked like an attack may become a testimony.

What feels like uncertainty today may become the very path God uses to lead me into something better tomorrow.

So I choose faith over fear.
I choose trust over anxiety.
I choose gratitude over bitterness.

And I choose to believe that no situation is bigger than the God who holds my life in His hands.

Perhaps this season is not happening to me.

Perhaps God is working through it, shaping me, strengthening me, and reminding me that my identity has never been in anything, but in Him.

And for that, I will keep trusting.

One day at a time... 

 A beautiful call, to walk with people 
To share their tears, to lift a prayer, to stand with hope when none is there.
Oh the joy our hearts can feel when God begins to move and heal
When prayers are answered, hope is found, and broken lives turn back around.

When sickness fades and strength returns, when peace replaces all that burns.
When families once in pain and strife find love, and laughter fills their life.
When children lost in fear or night begin to see a future bright.
These moments make the calling true a sacred path we’re glad to pursue.

For many nights on bended knee we fight in prayer for those we see.
For every home, for every child,for hearts once broken, lost, or wild.
Yet there are things few eyes can see, the quiet cost of ministry.
When some feel hurt or drift away, or feel forgotten along the way.

We hear their pain, we hold it near, yet carry silent burdens here.
Behind each sermon, prayer, and song are days that stretch our hearts so long.

And sometimes our most tender plea is whispered soft in secrecy
Lord, our children too may feel the pain, yet in Your hands they will remain.
Though tears may fall and hearts feel sore, we trust You’ll make them stronger, more and more.

For though this road brings wounds at times, it’s still a path of grace divine.
Through every joy and every call, God’s faithful hand still holds us all.

Many want the OIL...but run when the crushing begins, when isolation stretches long, when consecration costs comfort.
Yes, Jesus paid the ultimate price.
But your flesh still resists surrender.

So every time you say no to it,
it will feel like a sacrifice.
That is the point.
Oil is not automatic. It is produced.

The olive gives up something of itself.
Oil exists because something was pressed, crushed, and yielded.

The oil does not flow without pressure.
The calling does not mature without solitude.
And obedience will always cost the flesh
before it feeds the spirit.

Refining happens in isolation.
Furnaces are enclosed.
Heat is intentional.

Afflictions are also known as one of the environments where God calls and prepares people.

This is consecration through pressure.
Not everyone is chosen for the oil.
Only those willing to stay under the pressure

WHY “CRUSHING” ?
It involves surrender, yielding, and the breaking of the flesh, pride, self-reliance, and will. Scripture uses strong language for this process throughout.

• Psalm 34:18 says the Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those crushed in spirit.

• Psalm 51:17 speaks of a broken and contrite heart God will not despise.

• Isaiah 53:10 says it pleased the Lord to crush Him, speaking prophetically of Christ.

• Judges 6 shows Gideon pressed in hiding before being called.

• Joseph was pressed through betrayal, prison, and isolation before elevation.

• Jesus Himself was pressed in Gethsemane, literally meaning oil press.

The olive imagery is biblical, even beyond metaphor. Oil required pressure. The point is not that believers are destroyed, but that something of the self must give way so the Spirit can flow.

So yes, we are not crushed in defeat or hopelessness. But we are pressed, broken, humbled, refined, and conformed. That is the consecration I am pointing to.

•

Job 13:15 (AMP)

“Even if He kills me, I will hope in Him;

Nevertheless, I will argue my ways before Him.”

1 Peter 4:12 (AMP)

“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal which is taking place to test you, as though something strange or unusual were happening to you.”

Isaiah 48:10 (AMP)

“Listen carefully, I have refined you, but not as silver;

I have tested and chosen you in the furnace of affliction.”

#anointed #minister #ministry #church #officialmarliz

IMAGE CREATION: Me

MODEL IN IMAGE: Me 

INSPIRATION: God

WHEN LOVE COMES BACK TO YOU

WHEN LOVE COMES BACK TO YOU

Sometimes you pour out for others, unseen,
Giving more than you realise you’ve been.

You show up.
You pray.
You serve each day.
You carry hearts quietly along the way.

And you never keep score
You simply give more

Recently, I wasn’t well
Most thought it was small ..nothing to tell.

But kindness knocked at my door.
A warm meal set down on the floor.
Food in the fridge after a long night 
simple gestures, yet perfectly right.

They may have thought it ordinary, small.
But the timing said otherwise it said it all.

It felt like God whispering through,
“I see you. I’m caring for you.”

When you pour out without expectation or claim,
He sends it back though never the same.

Not loudly announced.
Not grand or displayed.
But tenderly timed.
Lovingly laid.

I stood there teary, heart full and free.
Overwhelmed by such quiet mercy...

His love doesn’t always thunder above.
Sometimes it arrives wrapped in everyday love 

In steel containers,
in a fridge filled tight,
In kindness sent
at just the right time.

And all you can whisper, soft and true,
Is, “Thank You, God… for loving me through.” 

Loving through praying

When carrying someone to God, we love them past our limitations. We admit we can’t prevent every hurt, predict every turn, or solve every problem. We entrust them to the One who never loses sight of them. Intercession reaches beyond advice. It covers unseen hours; the car rides, quiet rooms, untold conversations. It speaks when words fail and hearts grow tired.

We don’t wait for emergencies to pray. But praying in steady times, amid laughter. Covering choices, emotions, friendships, work, mind, and faith. Praying through peace and concern. Prayer is not a panic button but it’s love staying awake. Love that wants to listen without agenda, show up with a meal or a hug, or sometimes stepping aside to give space, releasing the steering wheel to God. Let God lead better than we could.

Lord we ask you to guard what we can’t, grant wisdom beyond our understanding, calm every storm, heal untouched wounds. Not to control their story, but cover it...

While praying, fear loosens.
Frustration softens.
Our urge to manage every outcome fades.
We we're never meant to be their savior...
Just called to love well.

Whisper their names to Heaven 

...those at home, across town, missed, 

or hard to understand.

Lift them with steady faith.

There is no stronger way to love.

In the Season of Becoming

If my heart isn’t right, the very anointing I prayed for will expose me.
Because real strength isn’t found in how loud I am in church but how steady I remain when I’m tested.
When God begins to entrust me with something, there will be challenges.
Not because I’m weak, but because what I carry matters.

If I’m truly walking with God, He will deal with me.
He will humble me....He will refine me.
He will teach me to stay silent when I want to defend myself.
He will teach me to remain kind when it is messy.
He will teach me to stay pure when I’m misunderstood.

God has been showing me my own weaknesses not to shame me, but to help me grow and become better.
So to those who see me only in my becoming, and are quick to judge what they don’t yet understand, I ask for grace ....I am in a season of learning and refinement.

Yes, I want everything God has for me  but I want the character to match the calling.
Because I never want to be someone who can carry oil but cannot carry themselves.

Lord, make me solid, anchor my heart.
Make me humble, refine my posture.
Make me steady, steady my steps.
Make me safe to use, make me fit for Your use.

Because without Your wisdom, I am not enough.

Getting back Candi Fernandes & School talk

 It was great to reconnect with Candi after many years, she brought back a me from 2019 that wanted to see beyond that time...But yet in the circle of life..I arrived back at the same point of start. A quick 20 mins or less than that is all what we took but felt really good. 

I stayed back home today for two reasons. One was an appointment to meet Mr R, who teaches AS Level Chemistry, at the school reception. I walked in carrying a million thoughts a whole narrative I had been rehearsing in my head. Things I wanted to demand, explain, clarify and even question. Questions layered with concern, hope, an, all competing for space before I even spoke.....

As I spoke, I touched on what I expect a teacher to inspire not just academic performance, but more. Not every student receives criticism in the same way; some absorb it as motivation, while others quietly withdraw. Today’s children are carrying pressures we never fully had ...to name constant comparison, social media noise, the fear of not measuring up. I said that while I want my child to do well in Chemistry, I do not want that success to come at the cost of her self-belief.

What I was really asking for was partnership. A shared awareness. A willingness to see progress not only in grades, but in how a student shows up willing to try, willing to ask, willing to not meet expectation and try again. I realised, as the words left me, that I wasn’t there to accuse or demand. I was there to advocate. I wanted to make touch base on the fact that sometimes a teacher's guidance can become discouragement if not worded the right way.

I wonder how much of it was clear in my words...Whether my words landed as intention, or dissolved into something else. Conversations like that are never just about what is said, but about what the other person is able or willing to hear. I tried to balance respect with honesty, concern with trust. Still, clarity is fragile when it meets habit..perhaps he heard a parent asking for leniency...perhaps he heard worry without the context of love behind it. Or perhaps he understood more than he showed, storing it away quietly, to surface later in small changes rather than immediate reassurance. I walked away without certainty, and that in itself is uncomfortable. But maybe this part of the process is about release ..saying what needed to be said, and allowing the rest to unfold without control. Trusting that God who is the Maker of all things is still in control and He cares much more about that child he created, perhaps much more than what a parent like me can fathom!!

Some conversations are not meant to conclude.

They are meant to begin something unseen.

And I have to trust that I did my part...God to take it forward !! 

Pondering....wondering..learning

Why do we accept this burden, the quiet agreement, to carry another soul’s unrest as if it were our sin?

God is not silent here. He is precise.
He says:“You are not the origin of what was already broken.”

And we tender, thoughtful mistake empathy for responsibility.
We apologise for existing clearly.
We soften truth until it barely resembles itself.
But God is teaching me....

Not distance born of bitterness, but boundaries born of wisdom.
The kind Jesus practiced when He walked away from those determined to misunderstand Him.

This lesson is about authority.

Who gets to name your intentions?
Who gets to define your heart?
Who sits on the throne of your self understanding?

Because when we hand that power to fear, peace becomes conditional and love becomes exhausting.
God is returning that power to us.
He is teaching you that clarity will unsettle insecure hearts and that is not your failure.
That being misunderstood is sometimes the cost of being aligned.

So lay down the weight.
The guilt that never belonged to you.
The blame that grew in soil that was never yours.
The urge to fix what only truth can heal.

Stand rooted. Let God defend what you no longer explain.

You are not harsh.
You are not wrong.
You are not the cause.

You are learning where responsibility ends and surrender begins.
And that, that is growth wrapped in grace. 

Reflection

Sometimes, without realising it, we fall into the trap of overthinking and overanalysing. Today, God gently reminds us:

When it feels like your words fall on quiet ground…
When stepping back seems easier than pressing on…
When your faithfulness feels small and slow to bear fruit…

Remember, our first calling is to love God with all that we are, and to love others as He has loved us.Everywhere we go, we scatter seeds of His truth, trusting God to bring the growth in His perfect time.You may not see the harvest your obedience has begun, but He is always at work.

So keep speaking of His goodness.
Keep telling of His unfailing love.
Nothing offered to Him is ever wasted. 

Self Study - Bible Notes - Job 1

Job, a man in the land of Uz whose name was Job. 

Was he descendenct

The land of Uz was in the near the land of the Sabeans (see in verse 15-17 they attacked) and the Chaldeans, somewhere in the Fertile Crescent between Tigris and Euphrates rivers

https://content-api.thebiblesays.com/content/501967/permalink

His touch

Holding On When Life Feels Loud

The past few months have been a mixture of noise and stillness, conversations, waiting, prayers whispered under my breath, and moments where I had no words at all. Life didn’t slow down even though my heart needed it to. And yet, somewhere in the middle of it all, God meets me quietly, faithfully to reassure me of His love, His plan and His purpose.

Health has been one of the louder parts of this season. Scans, reports, differing opinions, unfamiliar medical terms, and that unsettling feeling. I’ve learnt that uncertainty doesn’t just live in the mind it sits in the body too. It shows up as anxiety, raised blood pressure, restless nights, and all those What ifs?

There were moments I felt shaken not because I had lost faith, but because faith sometimes means standing still when you desperately want answers. I realised that trusting God doesn’t always look like confidence; sometimes it looks like turning up anyway, praying anyway, and choosing not to spiral even when the facts feel heavy.

Work has continued in the background responsibilities don’t pause for personal storms. There’s something humbling about showing up professionally while privately carrying questions and concerns. Yet, even there, I’ve seen grace. Strength I didn’t know I had. Clarity when I asked for it. And reminders that I am not defined by productivity, but by obedience.

Church have been both a refuge and a responsibility. Sitting through and preparing junior church assemblies, thinking about children’s faith, joy, and honesty all while God was gently teaching me the same lessons. I’ve been reminded that faith doesn’t have to be loud to be powerful. Children understand this better than we do they trust simply, they offer what they have, and they believe God sees them even when their names aren’t mentioned.

That truth has stayed with me.

Not every story in the Bible names its heroes, but God never forgets them.

And in the same way, not every season of our lives will be visible or celebrated but it is always seen by Him.

There were days I wanted certainty. A clear answer. A timeline. A guarantee. Instead, God offered presence. A calm nudge to take the next right step. Scripture that didn’t shout solutions but whispered reassurance. People who prayed without needing explanations. Moments of peace that didn’t make sense except that they came from Him.

I’m learning that faith is not about having everything figured out. 

It’s about choosing to trust when you don’t. 

It’s about surrendering control daily, sometimes hourly.

It’s about saying, “Lord, You know and that is enough for today.”

This season has stripped away the illusion of control and replaced it with something deeper: dependence. And strangely, there is freedom in that. Freedom in knowing I don’t have to carry everything. Freedom in allowing God to work in His time, not mine. I don’t know exactly how tbut I do know God has been faithful before, and He will be faithful again. Not always in the way I expect, but always in the way I need.

God is close to the broken-hearted, attentive to the quiet prayers, and present in the in-between.

For now, I choose to rest here. Trusting. Breathing. Believing.

One step at a time.

“Those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.” (Isaiah 40:31)

NEW Year ..New Beginnings

 Thankful to God for the opportunity... 

A lot on my mind...but one thing I know...

I'm held by a GOD who sees
I'm remembered by a God who lovees
I'm His child..not matter what 
I'm belong to a King..