Mesmerized: October 2025

I was eight months pregnant when I moved to a new country to join B. Looking back, I’m still not sure what I was thinking ... no friends, no major support system, no job, just faith that God would somehow carry me through. I left behind not only a career I loved, but also the city that had been my home since childhood. Abu Dhabi was where I went to school, graduated, got married, worked at HCT ( same place my dad once worked), and welcomed my first child. Leaving that city, that life, felt like tearing away a part of myself.

But inside me was you. My companion. My strength. As your big brother adjusted to a new school, and Dadda started his new job, you were the one who kept me going through those lonely days of being a stay-at-home mum for the very first time....

Your birth was a miracle. You arrived five days before your expected due date...though many said that the second baby would arrive early on. Born at Muscat Private Hospital, there was one God-sent mid-wife whose name I never read or asked but God placed her there ahead as she noticed your heartbeat dipping and acted quickly...I was rushed to hospital the night after mum and dad came from India, they had just enough time to get me essentials post the baby. After dinner, everyone went to sleep but I woke up to the water bag broken, At Muscat Private, they prepared me waiting for a normal delivery...it was the midwife who noticed it!! They said to be prepared for a C-section but said they would try for natural delivery. It was the hardest thing ... I had to wait for every cue from the doctor instead of trusting my own body’s push. You were born at 3.5 kg,..... a precious baby GIRL !!

When we came back home our challenges didn't stop,..You had an umbilical infection, and I remember holding your tiny hand and praying, speaking words of faith even when fear crept in: “You and I will grow old together. You and I will walk hand in hand. You and I will talk about life and changes.”..I told myself that this girl and I will be able to speak and discuss....things that I never did with my mom...I may not be your best friend in your eyes ...(yet) but....there are things I share with you that my mom didn't with me...

You were my middle child, and maybe that’s why I always felt a different kind of connection to you. I thought you’d grow up a tomboy, surrounded by brothers and with your dislike for girly clothes and hair ties. But then, deep down I prayed....and one day(trust me..it was big for me to see the change after years of dislike to dresses), I saw you blossom into your own girly-girl style, and I’ve loved watching you embrace who you are....

The years have tested us. In 2021, when Dad lost his job, you and your brothers stood by me without complaint. In 2022, when he had to work away in Iraq, I put on a brave face while parenting solo, and you all endured those long stretches with so much patience. We downsized homes twice, changed schools, and went through so many shifts... yet none of you made it harder for us. I remember the 2021 fasting prayer in the month of November where we all sat down in the presence of the Holy Spirit in tears, vending out our emotions even without vocalizing it... I think there were just hugs and tears that day and it was a healing ...that we didn't know we needed...For us we waited for that 28th day every other month when Dadda returned, we filled our home and hearts with joy and noise again.

In 2023, when Abel had to leave, we (Ben, you, and I) cried together in your room late into the nights, unable to sleep. I chose your room because it felt like a place of rest for me. Those were heavy days.. I even dreaded going to AGS, feeling like a lost parent carrying guilt that I wasn’t enough. Yet even in those painful nights, your (Ben and you) presence was my comfort...as I was still doing a lot of solo parenting.... I am thankful to God for how beautifully you and Ben stood by Abel and us all through it all.

And then came 2024 and 2025… your GCSE years. They were not easy. The teachers at AGS weren’t the most supportive academically, the amount of extra tutoring… the extra long nights, those tears… You worked so, so hard, but I also saw your struggles. I remember the nights you doubted yourself, feared your grades, the bad dreams you had, and how you would wake up anxious about what the future might hold.

You were one of the few who dared to take up 10 subjects at school and who still wanted to be the best at everything! I remember rooting for you to drop Sociology so you could focus more on subjects that were your interest… but how the Head of your Year Group pushed us to persevere… well, not us; it was all you (with a mighty Hand of God right behind you). You pushed yourself so much that my heart was full of love and respect for you. I love you so much for doing what you did, for challenging yourself, for persevering, and for showing such courage and determination. For getting your strength from God, You wanted to prove to yourself that you could do it. I may be that only mum who said not to stress about getting an A!!

I think it felt even stronger for me as a mum to have to drop a subject when we visited other schools… where we were told that they advise kids not to do more than 8-9 subjects… and here was my child… doing 10.

During the GCSE exams, I remember a dream that led me to pray together in our upper room, lifting every fear to God. There was even that moment when we acted out in faith...your dream, believing together that God was in control of your outcome.

And He was. You made my heart shine with your results: 6As, A*, and B. Not bad at all for someone who once wanted to drop two subjects! I couldn’t be more thankful, and I thank God for His hand over your life. There was even one subject where the school followed a book from an old specification.

And after the results, going back to AGS felt like God’s gentle reminder that He can turn things around in our favour. I couldn’t be more thankful, and I thank God for His hand over your life. Now, with another new school change, where the culture feels tougher and unfamiliar teachers and peer competition but we believe it would help you aim higher. Through it all, God has your back, I want you to know this: I love you, and I will always have your back. Dada loves you too...(since it is my blog..I'm talking about me)

From the little girl I once prayed over in the hospital to the young woman you are today, you have been my companion through faith and fear, joy and tears. You are my precious, my miracle, my reminder that God weaves beauty even in the hardest chapters of life....

I also love the little things that make you you. The way you doodle when life feels heavy ...turning stress into perfect sketches that somehow carry pieces of your heart. And the way you strum your guitar with Ben on keyboard, filling the house with music that lifts my mood and reminds me to be thankful. May God use those gifts to bring light to others and to glorify Him in ways you can’t even imagine yet!!!

There are things I wished my mum had done for me .. conversations she never had because, in her time, certain topics were either taboo or simply not spoken about. Those silences came from different beliefs and a different generation.

I’m grateful I don’t have to stay silent ....
I’m thankful I can ask, learn from you, and grow with you.
Your voice, your questions and your honesty teach me as much as I try to teach ...

And when doubts come especially now, as you wrestle with your AS-Level subjects and feel the weight of whether you’re good enough remember this: God will lift you. He has never left you before, and He will not leave you now.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” Exodus 14:14

“The Lord makes firm the steps of the one who delights in Him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with His hand.” Psalm 37:23–24

Hold these promises close, my love. God will help you.
He will strengthen you. And in His perfect time,
He will lift you higher than you ever imagined.

Happy birthday, my darling girl. You are one of a kind. You make my heart shine with just who you are, and I am so proud of who God is making you in to. May God bless you richly as you step into this new season of your life. ❤️

Started off a bit late today… I overslept more than usual 🙂. Instead of my usual walk, I decided to head up to the topmost floor .... the 3rd floor, which I hardly visit except for laundry.

There was plenty waiting for me there. The guest room hadn’t been set back after A left; even the water jug and glass were still sitting on the study desk. Once I was in, I couldn’t resist straightening the creases of the bed 🙂. I also checked the washroom since the property manager had mentioned that unused bathrooms can contribute to that unpleasant, “stale” smell.

It all gave me a few steps on my tracker and it didn’t feel like work at all.

Next, I wandered into the other bedroom, which has become our “store room” (but also has my favourite bed .. the daybed). After moving into this house, I don’t think I’ve really relaxed on it! In our previous home, it was in the first-floor common living space, so it was always in reach. Here, with no living space on each floor, I miss that easy access.

Since that room also doubles as our “gym,” I had to smile.... We downsized our equipment after moving from the PDO to Madinal Al Ilam and then to AL khoudh, so now it’s more of a multi-use room than a gym. And honestly .... thank God! If we’d brought the massive treadmill and elliptical (Abb’s favourite), there would be no space left. Instead, we just kept the spin bike, the barbell sets, some weights, and the medicine ball. Much more manageable 🙂......n Abbie didnt want to let go of her old study desk tat it got a space too..I took time to tidy it a bit..wanted to dust the floors but then thought I may lose the momentum.

I grabbed the 3kg weights on each and walked in...did a bit of strength and then decided to go down befroe kids leave....thanks to B for agreeing to take over the morning....breakfast :) I prep and leave some stuff but he has to execute it...and has been doing a great job..

As...i came down I saw all colorful balanced plates for kids too.....

Then I decided it was time to work on the outside .....more way to get steps and get work done..or when I was the top floor I did fold a lot of laundry, and put them in rooms..so tha was more steps...and this doesnt feel like I did a lot...

So outside...I grabbed the broom to clear the dried leave on the floor tuest me I go tmy sunglight dose, and my house cleaned plus 26 mins of exercise felt so good!! As i was diong all this I made it a point to water the plants...welll I am no plant lover but the previous tenatns had some that braved and stood ...the heat and summer..since 3 days I amw atering them..that gives me like 3000 steps wow!! ..

Came in to have my breakfast.....x